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Uncommon Accents

Old Rug Interviews

05-29-2011By: ESP

Mom’s answers first, dad's second.

1.    What did you want to become when you were twelve?
I wanted to be an actress.

An astronaut! Or a rug maker. For some reason I was obsessed with old rugs.

2. Are you happy with the way your life turned out?
Yes. Because I am raising three very special children. I regret that I didn’t find part-time work that went well with my parenting.

In most respects, yes. I’m happy with my wonderful family, my house and cars and pets. Sometimes I wonder if I chose the right profession. I could have done anything. It’s hard to choose on thing. I don’t know if I chose the right thing but...(He’s a screenplay writer)

4. Who was your last boyfriend/ girlfriend before Daddy/Mommy?
Jay Razumny. He was an actor. We broke up after we took a trip together and I found him very difficult. I said “I’m not going out with you anymore. It’s over”

Lisa’s sister, Ruth. Aaronson.  (He nodded off for a few minutes at this point, and I have no idea who any of those people are)

5. What’s the most terrifying thing you’ve ever done?
Trying to bungee jump in South Padre island. I just could not step of the platform. I cried all of the way down the elevator. It was also a very humiliating experience. But then I went with you on the vomit comet! That was terrifying and fun!
Going on that ride, the vomit comet, or shooting star or something. I went with Katy, in south Padre Island. I was talked into it before I knew what I was getting into.

6. How do you feel about your parents?
My mother and I have been like friends. We have a lot in common in our personalities. When I was a teenager, she was less of a mom and more of a friend. My dad had a very short temper when I was growing up. He’s mellowed in his old age though. He and I aren’t as close as my mom and me.

I love my parents. They were very good parents. Especially my mom.

7. What is your favorite thing to do without your family?
I love to go out and karaoke. But I haven’t done it recently.

Favorite thing to do? Without the family....  When I went on a white water rafting trip on the Colorado River. With Bill O’reilly and Lou Spoto. And that one guy, who DID turn out to be a Persian rug salesman.

8. What’s the worst thing Mom/Dad’s ever done? (Or what s/he does the most that annoys you)
When he gets oblivious. He doesn’t really hear what you’re saying. We call him Captain Oblivio.

When she stays out till two AM singing karaoke. On weeknights!  

9. What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had? What happened?
When my brother pushed me off the skateboard when I was ten. I broke my arm. Or maybe... When I had a hernia when I was pregnant. I had to have surgery when I was four months pregnant.

I got the wind knocked out of me in football practice. Oh wait... this wasn’t really an injury: once I got a terrible toothache in my wisdom tooth. It was horrendous. I had to have it pulled that day. I was thirty-eight.

10. What (in your opinion) are your best talents?
Usually I’m very good working with people. Organization.  I can act well.

Writing, obviously. Verbal expression. Good vocabulary. Knowing stuff about sports. (He nods off at this point)

11. What’s the worst part of your personality?
That I go through depressions from time to time.

There are no bad parts! I ‘spose people would say my absent mindedness. My tendency to get lost in the ozone.  (Even he knows he’s captain oblivio!)

12. What’s your pet peeve?
Children who won’t get out of bed in the morning! (At me) Waste of food, or energy or water... waste.

I have lots. I can’t believe I am not thinking of any at this moment. Software that doesn’t work properly.
(Especially with hardware.) Buggy software!!! I hate software that doesn’t work!  

13. How do you feel about Bush?
Bush handled the 9-11 pretty well. I don’t agree with his domestic policies. He’s totally weakened our environmental laws. His decision to lower taxes took money away from social needs. It wasn’t worth a few dollars to sacrifice.... (Trails off)

I think he’s a good man who’s trying to do his job as well as he can. Sometimes he finds the job overwhelming.

14. What was your favorite childhood pet?
I couldn’t have pets with fur. My dad was allergic. So my favorite pet was a boa constrictor. His name was Lucifer. I used to have him around my neck. People would say, “Is that real?” and I’d say, “No, it runs on batteries.” It was pretty funny.

Tomasina the cat. She moved from Minnesota to Texas with us. Then she caught some disease and died.

15. What’s your most vivid memory?
Right now it’s coming out of the church after getting married and having the rice thrown on us, and how happy I was.

Getting married.   Or maybe... That time I was in the auto accident when I was a kid. My dad was almost killed. A guy got killed in that accident.

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